9:32 a.m.
/
18 March, 2004

Some of us are losing our minds today, which was my secretive way of saying me. I'm a little worried about me to tell you the truth, not being able to sleep, not going to class a lot whole lot. I lay in bed at night with this feeling of fear on my chest, about essays and exams, and all the other bullshit. At the same time, I think I know that everything will get done. It always does, right? It's not like I'm about to sit back and let myself fail.

"Hey, you won't interfere with the basic rugged concept of me personality, will you madam?"

Sorry, 'Hard Day's Night', I tried to cheer myself up with a Lennon fix yesterday. It didn't work, and I knew things were bad when I found myself watching Sex and the City last night. What a bunch of... actually, I was surprised myself by not hating it as much as I hate most other things. It was better than trying to write my psycho essay, which is going very badly, by the way. Partly because I haven't been to many of the classes, partly because even when I do, I don't understand what he's babbling about. And also, because I don't understand the title.

I finished 'Choice', again to put off the inevitable essay write-up. I'm glad that it's finished, so that the story doesn't end up hanging in limbo land. I'm guessing a lot of people won't be content with it, but them's the breaks, kids.

My eyes hurt. I had to be up for a 9 o'clock lecture, but when I got there, I was 5 minutes late and there were no more chairs and I couldn't bear the thought of having to climb over people's legs and cause this huge commotion, and having to sit on the floor for 2 hours, so I didn't go. I know, I'm an idiot and that it's a horrible reason for not going, but there it is.

I need to go home and relax, I need my mummy to put things into perspective for me. I need my own bedroom, without shitty r'n'b music thumping a constant bassline through my brain, I need to go home!!!!!!!!!!!