don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you got 'til it's gone?

3:06 p.m.
/
10 November, 2003

Feeling kinda like crap today. Not mentally, but physically. Was ill kinda this weekend too, but at least turned up to work. I hate work. Such a short sentence, such a strong emotion.

Turns out I can't go to Girls And boYs and then go to G-A-Y the weekend after, because I'll miss too much work. I think everyone should boycott doughnuts to support me. Fight the power!

My baby brother is ill, and it's really awful. I hate feeling helpless and stupid, but he's going to the doctor's tonight, so that is good, at least.

I had a horrible dream last night. It serves me right for watching a Hitchcock film before bed, I guess. In the dream I had a baby, but for some reason, I left it on its own in a fishtank. And I had all these friends that like to kill things out of scientific interest and so my house was full of dead, mutilated kittens. They used these tiny knives that sort of looked like sewing needles from a distance and I kept having to hide them in the walls to protect myself and the baby. But then the baby suffocated in the fish tank.

My brain is a scary, scary place.

I'm going to call a girl called Martha about a room near college soon. I hate telephones, I really, really hate them. Almost as much work. I just don't feel comfortable talking to someone if I can't see their face. It would be good if I got this place, because she's a friend of a guy I know from LGBT, so there will be none of the usual crap of having to work out how to explain everything.

My favourite attempt was when I was talking to this woman at work, who was training me on how to do stuff and she goes: "Do you have a boyfriend?" And, without thinking, I just went, "Eww, no!" I forget that it's still a big thing, especially round here.

My brother's girlfriend (my older little brother, obviously) might be coming to live with us soon. How much fun will that be... she said sarcastically. Her family are very strange and just recently, they've been getting pretty violent and abusive. Still, I'm glad I'm moving out, because there's just not enough room as it is.

That's it, I have to go finish writing a chapter.


	Hitchcock Nightmares
	3:06 p.m. / 10 November, 2003 Feeling kinda like crap today. Not mentally, but physically. Was ill kinda this weekend too, but at least turned up to work. I hate work. Such a short sentence, such a strong emotion. Turns out I can't go to Girls And boYs and then go to G-A-Y the weekend after, because I'll miss too much work. I think everyone should boycott doughnuts to support me. Fight the power! My baby brother is ill, and it's really awful. I hate feeling helpless and stupid, but he's going to the doctor's tonight, so that is good, at least. I had a horrible dream last night. It serves me right for watching a Hitchcock film before bed, I guess. In the dream I had a baby, but for some reason, I left it on its own in a fishtank. And I had all these friends that like to kill things out of scientific interest and so my house was full of dead, mutilated kittens. They used these tiny knives that sort of looked like sewing needles from a distance and I kept having to hide them in the walls to protect myself and the baby. But then the baby suffocated in the fish tank. My brain is a scary, scary place. I'm going to call a girl called Martha about a room near college soon. I hate telephones, I really, really hate them. Almost as much work. I just don't feel comfortable talking to someone if I can't see their face. It would be good if I got this place, because she's a friend of a guy I know from LGBT, so there will be none of the usual crap of having to work out how to explain everything. My favourite attempt was when I was talking to this woman at work, who was training me on how to do stuff and she goes: "Do you have a boyfriend?" And, without thinking, I just went, "Eww, no!" I forget that it's still a big thing, especially round here. My brother's girlfriend (my older little brother, obviously) might be coming to live with us soon. How much fun will that be... she said sarcastically. Her family are very strange and just recently, they've been getting pretty violent and abusive. Still, I'm glad I'm moving out, because there's just not enough room as it is. That's it, I have to go finish writing a chapter. prev > next > fresh > rotted > profile > fans > rings > notes > email > design > host >