8:46 a.m.
/
04 November, 2003

Why am I here... well, basically because I don't want to get dressed for uni. Maybe Julia will turn up and I'll still be in my pyjamas and I'll go like that. Whatever I wear, she will disapprove anyway.

Had the most disgusting dream ever last night. I was a father, right, and I had this daughter, with stringy brown hair and skinny body and she kept saying that she was going to kill me. I kept flashing forward to the morgue, where I was lying on a slab, with a huge hole through my chest, so I knew I was going to be shot.

Anyway, this girl kept finding all this guns, little 9 millimetres and huge shotguns. Even though I knew it was a dream, I didn't want to go through being shot, so I kept having to fight her, knowing that it was hopeless. Every time I shot her, nothing happened.

Then one of my real life neighbours showed up and I rushed outside, asked to borrow her car and drove off. Once safe, I started worrying about my psycho daughter again and came back, on a motorbike this time. Anyway, as I came up the road, she came out the front door with a rifle. Somehow I managed to skip being shot and transfer to this woman who was standing on the sidelines. And she shot a hole right through the father's chest and he crashed straight into the front of the house.

I hate guns, they terrify me. I mean really. I will not go anywhere near a place where there is any kind of gun around. Remember kids, as Eddie always says: "Guns don't kill people, it's the bullet ripping through your flesh that does it." Okay, so he also says, "Guns don't kill people, people do. And monkeys do too, if they've got guns."